Despite Yuuichi's objections, his mother insisted on staying for dinner, and Ilana, hoping to please her future mother-in-law, agreed. Yuuichi thus found himself awkwardly sharing the dinner table with his mother sat on one side and his fiancée on the other. Thankfully, his mother's excitement seemed to cool a little, and when the questions inevitably came, they were one at a time and spoken in a normal conversational tone.
"So, are you actually legally married, or are you just engaged?" she asked.
Yuuichi chose to answer this one. "Technically, we're not either of those things," he said. "She might be a mail-order bride, but that doesn't actually mean we're married... I think…"
"I like to think we are married," Ilana chimed in. "Maybe we not married, but we will be soon, so what is, uhh, how you say... what is difference?"
"I... guess you could look at it like that..." said Yuuichi.
"So when exactly did you move here?" asked Yuuichi's mother. "A month ago? Two months?"
Ilana nodded. "About two months," she said.
"And you've already changed my son so much... thank you, Ilana!" said Yuuichi's mother. "I really mean it!"
"Is no problem," said Ilana. "I saw that Yuuichi is good man, but has, uhh, how you say... problems? No, is not right word…"
"Flaws?" suggested Yuuichi's mother.
"Yes, that is word," said Ilana. "Flaws. Yuuichi had flaws. So I help him get rid of flaws, and in return I be loving wife for him."
Yuuichi's mother nodded. "You shouldn't dote on him too much, though, or he'll get lazy again," she said. "I learned that lesson the hard way…"
"I am right here, you know", said Yuuichi sourly. His mother and Ilana both ignored him.
"Don't worry," said Ilana. "I make him help with housework, and then I play games with him."
"You're into video games as well?" asked Yuuichi's mother. "Oh, but I doubt you're a match for my son. He's the best gamer I've ever seen! He does spend all his time playing them, after all."
"He is very good," agreed Ilana, nodding. "He beat me many time. I am still learning, but I get better every time."
"I see," said Yuuichi's mother. "Well, even if I don't think Yuuichi's interests are entirely healthy, I'm glad you share them. It's good for him to have someone to play with."
"I told you, I'm sitting right here-" said Yuuichi, rolling his eyes.
"Oh, that's right!" said Yuuichi's mother, as though she really had forgotten he was in the room with then. "You have a job now, don't you? What kind of job is it?"
"I'm working in telemarketing," said Yuuichi. "I get to phone people up and ask them about their insurance policies and stuff."
Yuuichi's mother couldn't help wincing. "That doesn't sound like much fun," she said. "But it's something, right?"
"Actually, it has its moments," said Yuuichi. "Sometimes we get someone who tries to get us to hang up just by toying with us. They'll play us famous anime lines from an online soundboard, or give fake responses like asking for a loan of 10 billion yen, or just shout nonsense at us until we hang up. Every time it happens, we put them on speaker and we all try to contain our laughter until the call ends. Of course, we get way more people who shout or swear or put the phone down immediately, but you're right, at least it's something. I've got a steady wage now, and that's important."
"Does that mean you won't need us to send you an allowance any more?" asked his mother.
"Actually, I think we could still do with some allowance," said Yuuichi. "Otherwise it might be a bit tight to pay all the bills…"
His mother was immediately suspicious. "You're not just spending all your wages on games and anime stuff, are you?" she asked.
"No!" said Yuuichi. "I'm actually cutting back on all of that! But the wages aren't very good, and I need some extra money to treat Ilana and stuff..." Yuuichi's voice tailed off as his face grew bright red.
"I have to admit, I'm surprised," said Yuuichi's mother, beaming with pleasure. "I was starting to fear that you'd never be husband material, but here you are with a stable job and a stable relationship! And with such a beautiful girl, too! You really are a lucky man, Yuuichi."
"I know," said Yuuichi. "Sometimes I still can't believe she's in love with me."
"What is phrase...? 'Believe it!'" said Ilana awkwardly.
There was a moment of awkward silence, then Yuuichi's mother turned back to her son. "So, may I ask how things are going... you know... in the bedroom?"
Yuuichi, who had been drinking from his glass, choked and spat out a mouthful of water. "M-mom?!" he objected, his face turning scarlet. "You can't just say things like that!"
"But sex is an important part of any healthy relationship!" his mother replied. "Besides, surely I can expect grandchildren from you two in the future?"
"Mom!" exclaimed Yuuichi. "W-we aren't even married yet! I-it's way to early to be thinking about starting a family!"
"I agree," said Ilana.
"See?" said Yuuichi, glad that Ilana was backing him up. "Thank you, Ilana!"
Ilana nodded. "We should marry first, then think about children," she said.
"Have you set a date for the wedding?" asked Yuuichi's mother.
"No," said Ilana. "First, Yuuichi should buy engagement ring, so we are properly engaged."
"You're not supposed to just blurt out things like that!" said Yuuichi, growing more and more flustered by the conversation with every sentence. "What's wrong with you two?"
"Oh, calm down, dear," said his mother. "We're just having a friendly conversation, one woman to another."
"You're being too friendly!" Yuuichi objected. "And you're both completely ignoring the fact that I'm sitting right here next to you!"
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